TUMMY TIME !

Childcare experts say you should place babies on their tummies so they learn how to pick up their heads and strengthen their muscles, plus it gives the back of their a head a little reprieve since they're on their backs most of the time.

JJ's great at MULTITASK !

Is it wrong to be proud of your kid's burps and farts?Should you be scared when you find yourself saying things like, "Mommy needs a burpie. Now we do the burpie. Yes, now we do the burpie. You're not gonna do the burpie? Come on, baby, give Mommy the burpie. Yay! There's the burpie! Good boy ! Yes, you do the burpie! Yes."And what about singing songs of excretion? Is this something to be ashamed of?

I'm also impressed with my JJ's ability to multitask. Not only does he burp and fart like a champ, but he can do both of these things while EATING AT THE SAME TIME. Within one breath he burps and then snorts up the milk to make room for more milk. It's quite impressive. I wish I could figure out how to do an audio post about it. You have to hear it to believe it.

THE MUMMY BRAIN :


Here are some question that I came across when I read about parenthood.....And some answers that were given :-

Were you afraid your brain would suffer after you had your baby?

Yes, I was concerned I'd lose my mind to a world of diapers and baby bottles. There's an article about 2 researchers who discovered that mother rats were smarter — specifically in learning and memory capacity — than rats that never had babies. And it got me thinking maybe there's more to motherhood than I'd thought.

How does motherhood make women smarter?

Because smart is such a vague term, I broke the brain-boosting benefits of motherhood down into five attributes : perception, efficiency, resiliency, motivation, and emotional intelligence.

The first category, perception, deals primarily with the five senses. One of the most interesting studies showed pregnant women had sharper "visual acuity" than women who weren't expecting. By that I don't mean they suddenly had 20/20 vision but they did notice a lot more. Studies show that pregnant women also have an enhanced sense of smell, which theoretically serves to protect the unborn baby from foods that are potentially harmful.

Other findings show that mothers can experience a boost in motivation, fearlessness, and the ability to multitask and cope with stress. There's also exciting new research suggesting that oxytocin — a hormone important to labor and breastfeeding — improves moms' capacity for learning and memory.

Emotional intelligence is probably the clearest category in which mothers benefit, though. One of the biggest brain boosts for moms is the ability to see the world through someone else's eyes. In so many relationships, if you don't agree with a person you can just walk away. But you can't walk away from your child. At least, not if you want to be a good parent. Instead, you've got to stretch your mind to understand his point of view.

Did you find that people expected you to be "less smart" after you had children?

Yes. For instance I'd be sitting around with a group of women and someone would say something silly and then laugh it off as "mommy brain." Those kinds of experiences, trivial as they may seem, can make you feel as though you're going to accomplish less in life as a mother than you otherwise might as a childless woman.

In what ways did motherhood make you smarter?

I found motherhood tremendously stimulating, like getting a crash course in human nature. I also got much better at time management. As a mother, the notion of having less time to waste informs your whole life. More generally, motherhood helped me focus on the future. I became determined to prioritize things, that will matter more in my baby's life than my own. It's sort of like a midlife crisis. Once you have your baby, you reorganize your priorities. You think about your legacy and take your life more seriously when you realize your baby will examine it later.

What was the most surprising thing you learned ?

In a series of studies done by scientists in Switzerland, who compared the brain scans of parents to those of childless people. They found parents' brains were more active when listening to a baby's cry. On the flip side, brains of people who didn't have children were more active when they heard a baby's laugh. This suggests that a rewiring of the human brain occurs once you have children. Some researchers see it as evidence that motherhood makes women more empathetic. One scientist I interviewed says that moms learn empathy skills with their babies that they can later take out into the world at large.

Another surprising study showed that mothers react even to the annoying sound of a baby's cry with parts of the brain that are activated during pleasurable activities like eating a good meal or winning money. By equating the nurturing of a child with great food or sex, nature is ensuring that you'll bond with your baby, and stay engaged with the mental challenges your child will present you with for years to come. It's a pretty great system!

How does "daddy brain" change after the baby arrives?

Some interesting recent studies show that new fathers mimic in many ways the hormonal changes their wives go through, although on a much lower level. For instance, expectant fathers experience a surge of prolactin, a hormone typically associated with nurturing and breastfeeding, as well as increased levels of estrogen, the "female" hormone. Experts aren't sure why men experience these changes, but they think the higher hormone levels may help dads bond with their offspring. And the changes aren't all chemical.

Are the mind-boosting benefits of motherhood temporary or permanent?
That's hard to measure with humans, but in rat studies the benefits of mothering last until the animals reach an age equivalent to age 80 in humans, which I find very encouraging. And, when it comes to people, we know that seniors who are more connected to the outside world, especially through their children and grandchildren, are often healthier — mentally and physically — than those who are isolated. So motherhood continues to pay off late in life.

Constipated, but when it's a normal pooping day....

JJ has been pooping all day long. After the first poop, you think, "Glad to get that over with, now we can get on with our day." When the second poop happens, you think, "Wow, this kid's healthy!" When the third poop occurs, you think, "Hmmm, what have I been feeding you?" When the fourth poop makes it's way to your nostrils, you think, "alright, what's going on here...are you sick?" But you realize the poop looks healthy and your little poopasaurus seems to be feeling just fine. Then, when the fifth poop rears it's ugly head, you say out loud, "are you doing this on purpose???" You give a very conscious, disapproving look, as if to say, "stop all this incessant pooping!!" But you realize that you don't want to cause your small beloved to have "issues," so you quickly go back to smiling and singing happy poop songs. When that sixth poop comes into your life, you are cursing under your breath and wondering why you don't own any stock in the Pampers / Huggies corporation. You are smearing white, zinc based paste ( SUDOCREM ) between those cherubic little cheeks, hoping to protect them from further assaults. And you're wondering how many poops the other moms have to deal with in one day. I wonder if other kids poop all day like JJ.
This is a photo of him, very contented after being changed.

PHOTOS TAKEN ON IAN'S BIRTHDAY & DAY BEFORE HIS BIRTHDAY

Mum's the Baker who baked Ian's birthday Hedgehog Cake ! Yummy.

JJ : Secure with his manhood

While waiting for JJ's feed to warm up, I learnt something :

- If you take something from him ( his dummy ), he'll try and hit you ( as he freaks out and thrashes and flaps and punches his hands and legs in the air ).

- If you have something he wants ( his bottle of milk ), he'll take it and he may still hit you.

- His scream is louder than Ian and mine combined.

- He likes to be where his daddy is.

- He will keep screaming till he gets what he demanded ( nappy changed , fed ).

- He doesn't appreciate being changed when he's hungry. He'll sometimes show his appreciation by spraying in the air !

So, this is the making of a baby to a little boy to a man :P

HAPPY BIRTHDAY IAN the DADDY ! WHAT DO YOU GET FOR A MAN ( NO, boy ! ) WHO HAS EVERYTHING ??? 24.07.2006

It's Ian's birthday, but unfortunately it's a work day. We went out for dinner at Pizza Express ( Big rip off ) !
Got my birthday shopping done last week. Wasn't easy tho'. He has everything, so that makes things a bit difficult. Finally, decided to get him the XBOX 360 that he wanted. He has been very busy with that console, and right now, we have so many here....XBOX, PS2, Game Cube, Game Boy Advance, Nintendo DS Lite ( a birthday prezzie from Mark )....All boys' games. Maybe our little JJ will learn to play those toys too. He's also got a new Hugo Boss work shirt, Hugo Boss wallet and 2 pairs of cufflinks from the both of us ( JJ and I ). It's the least I can do because :

1. He banked in all his birthday money ( presents ) to get JJ's essentials.
2. He deserves his wife giving him some cool things ( from JJ too ) :P
3. He's got me the most expensive thing ever : My watch !

So when it's my birthday, I really don't want anything, coz I've got everything I need. Maybe doing something together with the family will be good fun ! ( P/S : This is a hint ! ). Maybe a drive to the countryside for a change of scenery ??

Then we walked and walked till we got back home again, safe and sound. HAPPY BIRTHDAY AND WE LOVE YOU TO BITS !

Let Sleeping Babies Lie

I have :

- Fed and changed JJ, then he fell asleep.
- Dusted. JJ slept
- Made lunch. JJ slept
- Had a shower, complete with a shampoo & conditioner, and he stirred, making some funny noises...Then fell asleep again.
- So, right now, I am sitting down, reading my book while he's still in deep slumber.

After this, I am going to pack up as we will be at Mum and dad's for the weekend, so hopefully he'll continue to sleep. I have just fed and changed him and I think he is falling asleep again now. He seems to sleep a lot today. Is he undergoing a growth spurt ? Is it too hot in here ? He seems a lot heavier now, and LONGER ! Oh well, I think I'll just let him sleep before he cries his head off and punching the air with his little fists, kicking his legs, asking for a feed again. If I go out for a walk now, he'll still be asleep. That means, I don't have to bring feeds and bottle warmer with me.

Debaucherous and Dishevelled ( now more than ever )

The Unanswerables

Perplexing questions that they will not answer in those thick, expensive baby books that fraudulently claim to tell you everything you’ll ever need to know:

1) How long can I leave my baby in a bouncy seat/other overpriced plastic infant contraption to look at Internet or have a drink or have a bite, without causing him any degree of loneliness/long term trauma? 5 minutes? An hour?

2) Is it OK to stumble to pick up naked when he groans plaintively in the night? Because I like to sleep naked. But I do not want to traumatize my baby with images of a surgery scarred belly.

3) How sensitive is his wee unit? How vigorously can I clean underneath his little sack? I don’t want to hurt him, but this being responsible for sensitively cleaning parts I’ve never had is pretty dubious at times.

4) Why do people scramble out of the way of a pregnant woman to hold the door/stub their cigarette/smile encouragingly, yet completely ignore a terrified-looking lady with a carriage/diaper bag/screaming giant baby attempting to get groceries ?

5) How come, every time I begin to think…I know his sleep schedule, his cries, what makes him happy….he completely changes his mind and does the opposite? Solely to make me insane? Or are there other dubious reasons as well?

Stuff We've All Worried About

Bring up any of the following topics to your new parent friends and they will all nod vigorously. Trust me, you are not a lunatic for worrying about any of the following things:

Your baby's weird breathing/noises - I am convinced that all newborns make the most alarming noises just to keep us on our toes. They stop breathing, make choking sounds, hack, cough, and splutter their way through the night. Although it does seem to sort itself out after the first couple of months, I don't know if any parent ever stops checking to make sure their kid is still breathing at night.

Poo analysis - Never in a million years would you have imagined yourself studying the contents of a nappy...and then discussing it with anyone who'll listen. Become a parent, and this becomes quite a normal part of everyday life. Baby poo goes through a myriad of changes (sometimes during the course of one day), most of which are perfectly normal but we analyse it anyway. I'm not sure when this phase stops. When they're toilet trained?

Rolling over during the night - Hurrah! Little junior has learned how to flip himself on to his belly! Holy crap, what if he does this at night? Babies shouldn't be on their bellies because of SIDS (cot death), right??!! Although it is advised that we place babies on their backs when they sleep, this is not really an issue once they can hold their heads up (and some babies just prefer to belly sleep right from the start). It doesn't take long for babies to learn how to flip themselves back over and if they get stuck trying, trust me, they'll let you know.

My baby isn't eating enough/I'm not producing enough milk - I really wish that boobs came with a visible milk gauge so you could see how much the baby is getting at each feed. Since they don't, you have to rely on other signs if you are worried that your baby isn't eating enough. If he is producing several wet and dirty nappies a day, this is a good thing (no really, it is). If he is gaining weight steadily and remains on the same percentile for weight, this is also a good thing. One thing that really surprised me was learning that what you pump (especially using a hand pump) may not indicate how much milk you produce during a feed. But now that I am not breastfeeding, I know how much he is getting, so I am not too worried.

Zzzzz....Zzzzzz.....The issue that no one told you !

There are approximately eight bazillion things that I can't cover in this post, but hopefully what I can cover about SLEEP does help someone out there somewhat.

Common Baby Myths about Sleep :

You are legally permitted to slap anyone who tries to convince you of any of the following myths:

"You can sleep when the baby sleeps" - This is utter nonsense because as every woman discovers, this is the only time you can actually get some fundamental things done...like shovelling a sandwich into your face before the baby wakes up or get the ironing done or wash up all the used bottles and then sterilise them all over again and prepare more feeds once the bottles are ready and if you're breastfeeding, you'll take the time to pump out the extra milk. Additionally, if you do try to sleep, you do so with one eye and both ears open, anxiously awaiting the sound of your little one's cries. Which leads nicely to the next myth...

"You get used to sleep deprivation" - No, you don't. You just learn to cope with it, eventually.

I haven’t felt this bad in a long time. I am having great difficulty sleeping-Couldn't sleep last night till about 3 in the morning, wondering what else I can do to get the extra pregnancy pounds off. I just wish I've got the same ass and body I had before I was pregnant !! I just feel rotten. Like the worst mother in the world. House is in a disaster, baby's crying in the background....I don't know what to do. I'm at a loss ! I think people owe it to their spouses to love them, to work hard at the marriage and to remember to try and make their spouses feel appreciated: And I DO feel appreciated, coz Ian does the babysitting after he comes back from work, and I get to catch up on my sleep ! At least, I know that he notices, and cares and appreciates all that I do, and I seriously appreciate it ! Weight is such an issue for women. and it's not even close to as difficult for men. It's not fair that our metabolism slows down by like 50% and theirs doesn't (i read that somewhere once ) !

I don't think the scales will ever budge if I remain lazy like this. My problem : I love desserts and chocolates and too lazy to get my ass out of the house to do some exercise. Never like that coz I used to look forward to our weekly exercise. Now, I can't even be bothered to see if my hair is OK. Just grab a scrunchie and tie my hair up. I've got this ''trying to lose pregnancy weight'' thingy bothering me this whole week, and worse today. Don't like looking at the mirror yet tho' coz I still look the same after JJ was out. Well, I know I look the same, no matter what other people are telling me. It's getting more and more frustrating each day, and now I am going to see if changing my diet works. Having a baby around you the whole day is quite a lot of stress and I am trying not to indulge myself in comfort food for now. Managed to do quite alright today tho' ! ( except the fact that I had to stuff down a Mars Bar ice-cream for lunch). Managed to get on with 2 pots of yoghurt and a coffee the whole day. Maybe this is just the start, I dunno ! I've discovered something about myself : I can stop indulging in chocolates / desserts if I really want to. Sheer vanity made it difficult for me to accept the extra pounds coz even tho I could squeeze into those pre-pregnancy clothes, they looked horrible on me. Probably more like a sausage ! Have to admit that I am sooo embarassed by my weight now. Summer's so hot now, and the heatwave is getting into me ! Lotsa people are in bikinis here, and me ???? No, I wouldn't even want to wear something that's body hugging !

If anyone out there has got any tips on losing the pregnancy weight, let me know !! Hey Doink, if you're reading this, tell me how did u manage to get that scrawny ! Just don't want to use JJ as an excuse for the extra pounds - '' I just had a baby, therefore I am busy, and therefore, I don't have the time to do anything ''. Went for a walkie around Tower of London today with JJ this afternoon ( in the heat ). Don't know if it's any good, but it's an effort ! Having a baby's just changed my life, but I guess, for the better. Sometimes, to make myself feel better, i tell myself this '' You are in new territory and your body feels different. It should. You are a mother now and your priorities are different. The child comes first—it's instinct with us. Don't fight that instinct. The day will come when you will return to yourself again. '' It just brings me back to reality, and keeps my sanity at bay whenever I thought of the 88 to 90 pound shadow that I was in before I was pregnant.

YUMMY MUMMY

What does it really mean ?? I have been thinking about this a lot recently... Does it mean to keep husbands happy by losing the pregnancy weight to go back to the size that got them attracted to you in the first place ?? Or dress up to look glamorous ?? There are two types of expectant mums - the Yummy Mummy that others look up to, with glowing skin, shiny hair and enough self-assured confidence to stay on top form, and the Bummy Mummy who gets overcome by her pregnancy.

Lets face it, becoming a mum is a bit of a shock at first, to say the least. Sleepless nights and eventful days make it a struggle to get a shower and wash your hair in the morning. Being pregnant and having a baby is the most natural thing in life, but it also cause us the greatest headaches and panic and worry ! When I found out I was pregnant, I was filled with joy- and panic ! How on earth would I manage ? How will I look after the baby is out ?? How much time have I got for myself and hubby after baby is born ? Do I still get to do the things I did before I was pregnant ?? am I going to be a good / bad mum ? Am I going to lose weight fast or am I going to look pregnant even after baby is out ? DID I STAND THE FAINTEST CHANCE OF REMAINING ME AND SOMETIMES LOOKING EVEN A TINY, LITTLE BIT LOVELY ? Could I too, be a lovely yummy mummy ??

I think the average new mum is one who's sleep deprived, overworked, up to her eyes in washing and sterilising, cleaning and managing a new baby while husband's at work. Most are not going to be in the luxurious position of putting their feet up until hubby comes home from work. We cannot leave out the pressure that we face nowadays....The endless parade of whippet-thin celebrity mummies ( Really Yummy Mummies ) who seem to drop their baby pounds in a matter of weeks or even days after giving birth, look gorgeous in their designer clothes, and have lots of help behind the scenes. It is impossible to match their standards but that doesn't stop any new mums from feeling that they ought to try too ! ( Just like me )....How in the world did Victoria Beckham look so good after her babies arrived ???

Here's what I think and feel : I think I feel that I look BIGGER than ever after baby's out ( Even bigger than my pregnant self ). Actually confession : GOSH ! Fat, Unattractive and afraid that hubby's no longer interested in me. Just want him to continue to feel proud of me when I was quite skinny ! My identity along with my waistline has disappeared when I entered motherhood. Geez, if I ever hear anyone telling me again that it's easy to lose pregnancy weight, I am just going to say '' Hey, no way ! Look what pregnancy's done to me !!! ''. There's enough pressure on new mums already, with the babies screaming and shouting for their feeds, and now the pressure to lose weight. It is impossible to even get some time out to go out for walkies with the baby during the day...All you want to do when the baby's asleep is to get a little nap at the same time to make up for the sleeping time that you've lost while looking after the baby at night, and the last thing is to tire yourself by going out for walks in this heat. So yea,yea...All the talk about getting fit back again after baby is born....No such thing ! Tell me about it ! By the end of the day, you feel so shattered ! I'd like to have my flat tummy back coz I still cannot fit into most of my clothes and it is quite annoying !! It's summer now, baking hot like you're in the oven, and i can't get back into my old clothes !!! Very, very annoying and it's getting me down ! Some ladies in the superstore did say '' Oh, you're flat again'' , but of course, I don't believe a thing coz I know that's not true. How can I be flat when I can't fit into my pair of jeans that used to slip down easily - without having to unbutton the flies !

Oh well...Just me, grumbling and ranting at 2.16 am....Baby's fed, changed and asleep now...So I will do the same after a nice, cold shower !

I finally understand that the term "Stay-At-Home Mom" does not refer to a parent who no longer works outside the house, but rather to one who never seems to get out the front door. I will now understand what people mean when they say that parenthood is the hardest job they will ever have. In my LBD (life before diapers), going out means me + a handbag ( inside handbag : housekeys , wallet, tissues, wet wipes, a bottle of sanitizer, a notebook, a pen , novel ). Now = Me + Baby + Pram + Changing bag ( inside : a bottle of formula , a flask with hot water, a bottle warmer / thermal bag , nappies, nappy sacks, baby wipes, bibs, change of vests, booties, sanitizer, tissues, change mats, digicam, videocam , baby's hat, baby's sunshades, wallet, housekeys, notebook , pen , novel )...Oh and getting ready used to take less than 5 minutes, and now, nearly an hour ( especially if JJ decides to have a feed and then make me change his nappy before we leave ). I realise now that I used to take escalators and stairs for granted. Nowadays, we have to lookout for lifts and ramps at shopping malls.

I think I am a step closer to one of life's greatest accomplishments. No, I did not find a cure for AIDS / discovered a new planet somewhere, but I am now holding a miracle in my arms. Jamie Ian Jones is my life's greatest accomplishment. I have never felt this proud when I completed the Nursing Course / won medals in sports. When he was born, the pride I felt was almost like the day I became Mrs I Jones. These are the 2 very special moments that I'll cherish forever ! Given this opportunity to raise him is my greatest challenge. All I want to do for him is that he'll grow up to be happy and fulfilled. Both Ian and I will do anything for him to achieve that. As challenging as parenthood is, it is also equally rewarding, because we are using all our wisdom, our talent and skills to help forge a new person. It is this person, these people, who, in turn, will use their gifts to create our future.

In the mean time, he is now calling out for food, and here I am, waiting for his feed to warm up, typing this at nearly 12 midnight ! I guess doing this is the only thing that keeps me on the border of insanity.

JJ's FIRST TRAIN TRIP

Mum and Dad were at our place this morning, and after a big traditional English breakfast, we headed to the Tower Hill underground station to get a train to Westminster. Walked around in Hyde Park and in front of Buckingham Palace in the warm summer sunshine. Managed to change Jj's nappy in the station without any problems. Gave him his feeds in the parks and he didn't seem to mind feeding in the open air.

Mum was a bit cheeky today. What's on dad's head in one of the photos ???

Took some great photos of JJ and grandparents and us at the parks.

Yesterday we placed JJ on a playmat and he enjoyed every minute. He was very alert and we think it's a great way to get his limbs to reach out for things hanging above him. One of the pics shows JJ winking at the toys. ( or seems like winking, don't think he knows how to wink yet ! )

Tower of London Walk

A stroll along the Tower of London is quite fun actually. We just got home after our evening walk with JJ in the pram and here are some photos that we'd like to share...Managed to get a shot of a paddleboat going under Tower Bridge....See, the bridge is opening to make way for the boat, and the paddles are red in colour. Haven't seen a boat like that before.

Take a close look at JJ's new pair of Baby Sunshades. It's for babies till the age of 2. In one of the pics, see if you can spot a little smile on JJ's face. Took that photo yesterday.

WHERE IS THE INSTRUCTIONS & OPERATING MANUAL ???

Thinking back of JJ's first bath ( by the both of us ), it makes me laugh when I think about it. I thought I could do it quite well without any trouble ( Used to be a Staff Nurse and bathed baby in the nursery, and also was shown how to give JJ a bath in the hospital before I was discharged ), but I failed the first time. We even bought a bath support before he was born to make things easier, but while we were at Ian's parents' home, we used a baby bath tub and here's what happened.

We placed him in the bath and to my horror, I forgot how slippery babies could be. HIs little head flopped all over the place and he kept shouting and screaming his lungs out, and the worst part is that he kept going round and round the tub. I panicked and I thought he was going to go underwater. Well, anyone reading this can laugh about it, but it wasn't funny that time. WHERE WAS THE INSTRUCTIONS MANUAL THAT SHOULD COME WITH OUR BABY ??? Was glad to be back in London on Monday coz since then we have no problems giving him a nice bath. It is meant to be relaxing the baby, but I think the way I did it just made him distressed ! :o) Here's a pic of our bath support ! It is a MUST HAVE THINGY !

Also, there's a little problem changing little boys. I have discovered that after a few major accidents. I always end up changing his whole outfit and use up at least 2 nappies whenever accidents happen. One major accident was when I changed him on the floor.....My legs were just right in front of him teeny weeny bum and after I have finished cleaning him up and getting ready to put a new nappy underneath, I heard some ''explosion '' and felt something warm ''shooting'' at my leg. To my surprise, it was poop all over the changing mat, on the floor and ON MY LEG !!! Aaargh ! Warm and slimy ! Then I had to clean it all up and got ready to put the next new nappy, and I felt a shower on my face. This time it was PEE !! All over me, and on his face and outfit. That was hilarious, but it's still a learning experience. Now I put disposable changing mats on the proper changing mat and then change him. It works !

Mother(Yawn)Hood
by Faith R. Foyil©2003

Accustomed to No Sleep
(To the tune of “Accustomed to her Face” from My Fair Lady)

I've grown accustomed to no sleep
It’s how every day begins
I've grown accustomed to the fact that
by 11 am or noonI yawn, I frown, I’m feeling down.
It’s second nature to me now
Like having jet lag all the time
I didn’t have this vacant look before I decided to give birth
Surely eight straight hours would help me regain a bit of mirth
I've grown accustomed to being tired, accustomed to feeling blah
Accustomed to no sleep.
I really love my little children and ask you not to forget
That without them this song would have no meaning -
and yetI sometimes want to weep,
I’m sluggish all the time
Accustomed to no sleep.
Do you struggle to keep your eyes open
during ear-blasting, firework displays?
Have you gone without a really good night’s rest for about 200 years?
Are you so tired you could sleep on these words right now?

Some authorities refer to this as “sleep deprivation”. In actuality, this common phenomenon is a symptom of the malady we female parental types know as “Motherhood”. It starts out like this:One day you’re newly married and partying with friends on a Friday night, complaining about jobs, husbands, and commiserating over failed diets. Next day’s Saturday. You sleep ‘till 10 am. Saturday afternoon you realize your period is late. The drug store tester kit reads positive. You’re so amazed you can’t sleep a wink that whole night. Motherhood has begun.

Step#1 During pregnancy you toss and turn all night because there’s a nocturnal, one- ring circus act going on in your belly. You also have really bad indigestion which disturbs your sleep, only when you’re not already awake from having to pee twice a night.

Step#2 Delivery time! In order to obtain your B.A. (Baby Award) you must moan convincingly for at least 48 hours straight. Your new baby arrives, gets cleaned up, weighed and bathed by people who actually know how to do this stuff. Within 24 hours, you’re wheeled out of the hospital sitting perched on a rubber doughnut because your groin feels like a steering wheel just pushed itself out.A nurse hands you your precious, little bundle and tells you he’s still a bit jaundiced and you should FEED HIM ROUND THE CLOCK EVERY TWO HOURS. This stranger incorrectly assumes you know what to do with this small, human blob thing. DOESN’T SHE KNOW YOU ARE EXHAUSTED? The nurse waves goodbye with a smirk. You begin to understand that YOU ARE NEVER GOING TO SLEEP AGAIN.

Step#3 The next few weeks are lots of fun if you’re into 24 hour cycles of non-stop crying, burping, pooping and peeing. Junior, despite being kinda cute, has colic and thrush, can’t digest formula, and seems to be allergic to both your laundry detergent and your husband. You’re still fat, too, by the way.

On your first night out sans Junior, friends discuss fashion, the war in the Middle East and local politics. You just want to talk about sleep. You’d rather Do IT, but talking about it helps. You ache for it, would steal for it. It’s better than sex, better than chocolate. Gimme, gimme sleep.

NEXT DAY: There will be a two-day window of opportunity when your baby sleeps through the night without requiring sustenance. TAKE ADVANTAGE OF IT.

One Day Later: Even though Junior’s social skills consist only of loopy smiles and uncontrolled drools, you schlep him to his first play group. This evolves into years of day care or pre-school, which signifies exposure to BAD GERMS. You are now awake half the night at least three times each week wiping his runny nose or sore butt, administering to a sore throat, itching torso or upset stomach.You will also succumb to all of these ailments yourself, but always a day or so AFTER Junior recovers. This means you puking all night while the previously barfing Junior sleeps blissfully in the next room. When you have additional children, the consequent ones will be sure to catch the bug and stretch it out so that the Zombie Mother persona continues for at least two weeks thanks to one lil’ ol’ 24 hour virus.

Step# 4 More children. Same scenarios. They grow up a bit. You assume you will finally sleep again. Boy, are you naive! One kid forgets to lock up the dog, who triggers your burglar alarm. You crawl back into bed exhausted at 2 a.m. and remember you didn’t bake brownies for tomorrow’s Grade 5 bake sale. You don’t actually get up and bake, but you feel so guilty you can’t sleep, which jolts your brain into worry mode about your new part-time job, Christmas shopping for your hard-to-please mother-in-law and missing your oldest child’s visit to the popular orthodontist with whom you might be able to reschedule in about five months.

Step# 5 A few years go by. Your oldest kid still doesn’t have a driver’s license, but you, the selfish baby boomer who waited until your late thirties to give birth for the first time, find yourself AGAIN peeing two times a night and not sleeping properly. No, you’re not pregnant. You have pre-menopausal INSOMNIA. Every publication you pick up stresses the importance of sleep to avoid wrinkles and serious illness at this stage in your life. Based on this theory, you calculate you have six weeks before you resemble an over-baked Cornish game hen with chronic back problems.During the next few years your kids will want to stay out all night really late. You won’t sleep comfortably until they’re home.

Welcome to Mother (Yawn) Hood.

You know you're ready to be a dad when...

You Know You're Ready to Be a Dad When...

1) You smile at any little kid that will look at you.
2) The thought of assembling nursery furniture and toys gets you excited.
3) You take ultrasound pictures to the office to show all your co-workers.
4) You've installed the car seat — eight months before your wife is due.
5) You won't mind strangers touching your pregnant wife's stomach.
6) You can't resist buying that rubber ducky or cute little outfits.
7) You start looking at baby outfits and saying, "Ooooh, that's cute!"
8) You begin feeling sorry for friends who don't have children.
9) Your single friends start avoiding you.
10) Your wife begins referring to you as "Daddy."

You Know You're a New Dad When...
1) Little kids smile and make funny faces at you.
2) The thought of having to assemble anything gives you a headache.
3) You take birth photos to the office to show your coworkers.
4) You discover you've installed the car seat wrong, but lost the directions eight months ago.
5) You're sick and tired of strangers poking at your baby.
6) You have nightmares featuring squeaking toys.
7) You look at your baby's outfit and say, "Ooooh, is that poop?"
8) Friends who don't have children feel sorry for you.
9) Your single friends continue to avoid you.
10) Your baby says, "Da-da," and it's the most wonderful thing you've ever heard.

Confessions of a stay-at-home mum

1:00 am - Baby cries, Get up, feed him, change nappy. 5 minutes later, change nappy again.

1.45 am - Back to sleep.

3.00 am - Baby cries, Get up, feed him, change nappy.

5.30 am - Baby cries, Get up, feed him, change nappy. 5 minutes later, change nappy again.
Hubby's first alarm goes off. Make a cup of tea and rock baby.

6.00 am - 2nd alarm. Hubby gets up for work. Makes breakfast for hubby.
Wash up night's used bottles and start the steriliser.

7.00 am - Go online, check e-mails to maintain contact with the world. Have a cup of tea and a
slice of toast, and a quick ( really quick ) shower while baby is still asleep.

8.00 am - Baby cries, Feed him, change nappy. Baby keeps on crying, pick him up and hold him
for an hour or two as he is wide awake and wants to be cuddled.

9.25 am : Watch Jeremy Kyle, also at the same time, feeling very glad that I've got a very happy
and perfect family here.

11.00 am : Baby cries, Get up, feed him, change nappy. 5 minutes later, change nappy again.
Grabbed a glass and make myself a nice cold drink. Make a sandwich for lunch.

12.00 noon : Go over to the superstore to get some shopping done for the day's dinner.
If hubby's back for lunch during lunch break, sit down with him to have a decent
lunch together.

12.15 pm : Check nappy again. Have an afternoon nap with baby while he is still asleep.

12.45 pm : Baby whines. Check nappy - NOTHING. Also not hungry. Pick him up, and he's
happy. Aaaah, just wants some cuddles and hugs.

1.30 pm : Baby cries, Feed him, change nappy. Watched WHO WANTS TO BE A
MILLLIONAIRE....Just to see how much knowledge left in my brain since I left
school. Hold baby for nearly 2 hours because he's awake and wouldn't let me put him
back into his cot.

3.30 pm : Watched Countdown to test my Math and Wordsearch skills. Have a quick shower.

4.15 pm : Watch DEAL OR NO DEAL with baby crying in the background. Baby cries, Feed him,
change nappy. Get dinner ready before hubby's back from work.

5.30 pm : Have dinner with hubby. Eat one bite. Baby cries. Get up, check nappy- Aaaah,
Pooped again. Changed nappy. Just about to put nappy in place - Oh no !!! Peee !
Weeeeee all over. Wet everywhere ! Wipe and Sterilize everywehere. Changed nappy.
Hubby's finished with dinner. Hands over baby to hubby. Now, I can sit down and
have my cold dinner. ( I don't mind that tho ).

7.00 pm : Baby cries. Feed him, change nappy. Baby finally falls asleep. Gingerly put him back in
his cot and envy the fact that he is sleeping.

8.30 pm : Wash up feeding bottles and hubby's work bottles. Have a quick shower.

9.00 pm : Watched Big Brother.

9.45 pm : Baby cries. Feed him, change nappy. Stare blankly at baby till he falls asleep. Put him
back into his cot wishing that I could go to bed too.

10.30 pm : Prepare night feeds, start steriliser, prepare hubby's smoothies for lunch tomorrow.

11.00 pm : Baby whines. Check and change nappy. Baby goes to sleep. I do too.

12.30 am : Baby cries, Get up, feed him, change nappy. 5 minutes later, change nappy again.

Begin an entire day again from there onwards.....This is what goes on in my everyday life....Interesting ??? I luv it :D

But weekends are different, so it's another different story. Will save it for another day, if I remember.

Once upon a time, before I was a mum....

1. I had time to shower everyday.
2. I slept through the night.
3. My husband and I went on dates.
4. I could read books without interruption.
5. I could go out for my weekly exercise.
6. I had a flat tummy.
7. Our place used to be very quiet when Ian's out at work.
8. Our fridge was full of chocolates ( and now, it's milk bottles )
9. I could sleep for hours during the day.
10.I used to be free !

Why mothers cry...

Here's something I read in a post recently, and would like to share with you guys...Especially now that I am a mum myself....

"Why are you crying?" he asked his mom. "Because I'm a mother," she told him. "I don't understand," he said. His mom just hugged him and said, "You never will!" Later the little boy asked his father why Mother seemed to cry for no reason. "All mothers cry for no reason," was all his dad could say. The little boy grew up and became a man, still wondering why mothers cry. So he finally put in a call to God and when God got on the phone the man said, "God, why do mothers cry so easily?" God said, "You see son, when I made mothers they had to be special. I made their shoulders strong enough to carry the weight of the world, yet gentle enough to give comfort. I gave them an inner strength to endure childbirth and the rejection that many times come from their children. "I gave them a hardiness that allows them to keep going when everyone else gives up, and to take care of their families through sickness and fatigue without complaining. "I gave them the sensitivity to love their children under all circumstances, even when their child has hurt them very badly. This same sensitivity helps them to make a child's boo-boo feel better and helps them share a teenager's anxieties and fears. "I gave them a tear to shed. It's theirs exclusively to use whenever it's needed. It's their only weakness. It's a tear for mankind." Author Unknown

Weighting Game

Just can't fit into my favourite red Versace top. Damn. Wish I am back into my pre-pregnancy weight coz I was happy being that size and weight. ( Don't want to be the only Fatso walking alongside Ian and JJ next time ). Have to admit I enjoyed the weekly trips to Judo classes with Ian, but now, my priorities are Ian and Baby JJ. Gym is not so good for me as I am only familiar with a few equipments, but I like the treadmills there. Really cool, coz' it saves me from the flying insects out there and it's indoors, therefore I wasn't running around in the cold when it's spring / winter. ( Maybe build up a muscle or two ! Hehehee, like Sylvester Stallone or the Gladiators Girls ). I really should think of trying to get some exercise done at home. At least, I hope to get my flat fummy back again. Minus the flab = Flat tummy. Anyone with any good ideas ? Don't tell me about dieting....I hate salad, I hate vegetables, I love desserts and chocolates ! Here are some pics of me: before I was pregnant with JJ, when I was still pregnant and one's the after effects of pregnancy. Oh well, I used to be very proud of my body and now, I think it's not as nice anymore.....Boooo hoooo ! How in the world did celebrities get back into nice skinny bodies after popping out babies, I wonder ! Won't dare to step on any weighing scales yet, just in case I end up breaking 'em.

THE JOY OF RAISING A BABY

We’re glad you joined our family,
Yet some things make us wonder;
How can a little package like you
Have a voice that’s loud as thunder?

You are so small and oh so cute,
But you are never very shy,
For whenever you want something,
You just open your mouth and cry.

Diapers here and diapers there,
Stinky... smelly... Whew!
Diapers would have done us in,
If we didn’t love you as we do.

We’re glad you joined our family,
You’re a unique and wonderful treasure.
So, despite the work of raising you,
Being your parents is a total pleasure!

Why God Made Little Boys


God made the world out of His dreams
Of magic mountains, oceans and streams,
Prairies and plans and wooded land,
Then paused and thought “I need someone to stand
On top of mountains, to conquer the seas,
Explore the plains and climb the trees.
Someone to start out small and to grow,
Sturdy, strong as a tree…” And so,
He created boys, full of spirit and fun,
To explore and conquer, to romp and run.
With dirty faces and banged up chins,
With courageous hearts and boyish grins.
When He had completed the task He’d begun
He surely said “A job well done”.

LET THEM BE LITTLE

This is from a song.....

"Oh, let them be little 'cause they're only that way for a while Give them hope, give them praise, give them love every day Let them cry, let them giggle, let them sleep in the middle Oh just let them be little"If they could only stay little...Because they don't, there are times it's nice to have the kids sleeping in the middle-as long as they understand it's a "special" night and not something they should get used to doing on a nightly basis.

Here's our sleeping cutie !

A Good Night's Sleep
By Jeanette LeBlanc


I really wish I got more sleep.
I'd like some time to count some sheep.
Just a few hours in my bed,
A pillow beneath my weary head.
Time on my own so I could rest.
A full night's sleep would be the best.
A quiet baby down the hall.
Is this order way too tall?

I can't remember when I last slept.
I am so tired that I have wept.
A tear or two, or three or four,
Stop to care for my baby, and then cry even more.
I've "whispered" night after long, long night.
I've read all the books and nearly lost my sight.
I've no more idea now than I did then,
Of course he'll sleep someday; but I want to know when??

We've danced, we've paced, we've rocked for an hour.
We've stood in the bathroom and ran the shower.
We've tried all the tricks that came to our head.
We've even brought him to our own bed.
He's my baby boy, and I love him to bits,
But this sleep deprivation is really the pits!
I long for a night of slumber so deep.
When I can sleep eight hours straight, and not hear a peep.

Is this only a wishful thought?
He can't be trained, he won't be taught.
I guess I will just have to wonder and wait,
It could be quite a while at this rate.
I've come to terms with all of the stress,
The lack of free time, my house is a mess!
But through it all, I know in my heart
That lack of sleep is just a very small part.

Oh the things I will do for my sweet little baby
I love him more than life, and I think, just maybe.
Someday soon I'll figure it out
And when I do I will give you a shout.
Yes, one day I'll make it to my lofty goal,
Right now I think I might be on a roll.
She's slept six hours straight and I've not heard a peep.
What am I doing still writing? I should be asleep!

Inner Thoughts
By Colin Knauf

"If I Could Speak, This is What I Would Say"

If I could talk, here's what I would say:
Hold me close to you, where happy I'll stay.

I am your gift, and you are mine, too!
Let our bond together be a love that is true.

Snuggle me tenderly, close to your chest.
It is here next to you, I am at my best.

Your rhythmic breathing and beating heart,
contentment and comfort to me impart

To see you, smell you, assured by your voice,
these wonderful, simple things help me rejoice.

A cuddle, a kiss, some playful frolic
can banish a mood and prevent any colic.

My learning is best when I'm perched at your side,
with your arms as my classroom and you as my guide.

When you hug me, hold me and show me your day,
you're sharing your love in the most meaningful way.

Please hold me up high, so that I might see
all the wonders there are surrounding me.

With our time spent close while you socialize,
my understanding grows and better I vocalize!

When you work, walk or take a short trip,
with me safely balanced upon your hip.

Our muscle tone improves, my self-esteem is greater,
and I'll be walking much sooner rather than later.

When we are in touch, it reduces our stress,
as we are happiest then and worry much less.

Safe in your arms dispels all my fears.
My beaming smiles replace streaming tears.

Dreaming of our future is significant too;
I know a career is important to you.

When I am older and we'll join in the race,
then we'll be more able to keep up the pace.

Right now, what I know as certain and right
is that you are my sun and the source of my light.

I don't care if what we've got is old or new,
all that I really want is security with YOU!